how do I

During a conversation today, I realized the next step in my healing journey. I need to be able to look at my scars and see the beauty in them.

Yeah .. not really seeing how to do that one. Ok, so I have grown somewhat used to them. And ok, so I don't hate them anymore. And fine, I don't think they're horrific. But see the beauty? Really? (And why can I totally do this for someone else but I can't do it for me.)

Anyway, it made me curious whether anyone else has struggled with this and has ideas or thoughts to share. I feel like I must not be alone - because it can apply to anything really. Scars. Perceived flaws. That one "problem area". You name it.

Comments

[steph]

Ooh.

Oooooooooooh.

I don't know if I have anything helpful to share, but I can safely say that you are not alone. I think I have some problem areas/perceived flaws where I'm starting to at least acknowledge the possibility of beauty, even if I don't actually see it yet (other than--maybe--some brief glimpses every once in a long while). But I also have some actual physical scars/changes for which seeing the beauty would be good next steps in the healing journey.

[anne]

I hate my scars. But then a few days ago I decided I am actually an 8 on the 1-10 scale. I took off one point for being fat and one for the lupus/roid skin scars all over my body. And and 8 is pretty darn good, lol.

Anne

[nancy]

Exactly what steph said. Something to work on (like I don't already have enough)!

[Rose]

Well most of my scars are internal, but I recently did my Level 1 Reiki and a lot of the stuff it's bringing up for me I'm bringing up on my blog.
I can't say much other than to remember all the things your body can do (we can walk and dance and sing and see and.. the list goes on) and to remember that if that ever happened to someone else; you'd be perfect at helpin them through it.

Rose.

[Amy]

As I meant to say, it's not about seeing the parts of you individually, maybe, but about seeing the you as a whole... that all of the parts make up you... and the scar is just one part. When I look at you, I don't see the scar, I just see you... the scar is there but not there... hard to explain.
But I do think it's pretty.... kind of like a topographical map on your back.

[Alison]

A dear friend suggests practicing self-forgiveness when judgments about ourselves, situations, or others cause us emotional pain or keeps us from moving forward in some way. I'm finding it easier to forgive the judgment than to try and change the thoughts and feelings (they seem to have a mind of their own!). I'm also amazed at the judgments that come up during the process that I wasn't even aware of. I’ve attached a link to her website where she explains the process, if you think it might be beneficial.

http://irenekendig.ning.com/profiles/blogs/selfforgiveness-part-i

[elizabeth @ the blue lotus]

@Alison: Self-forgiveness for the judgments is an excellent idea! Thank you so much for sharing that. I can see how it would be easier to do while the thoughts and feelings are (hopefully) shifting. I will definitely check out the link.

@Amy: Thanks for the clarification. That is what I was thinking about - in general and with regard to my photo idea - but the view is always different for the person who is looking at their own self so I think the next step is still valid. I am intrigued by the topographical map idea. :)

@Rose: Oh! I am excited to read about your experience with Reiki! And yes, our bodies are marvelous. It is good to remember and appreciate that. I'm pretty sure we (ok, I) don't do it nearly enough.

[elizabeth @ the blue lotus]

@Steph: I think that's wonderful that you are beginning to see the possibility of beauty in those areas, and I hope it grows and grows. :)

@Anne: and then you will have to add 1 for your personality and another 1 for your sense of humor and another 1 for your seriously amazing craftiness. Ha - you're actually an 11! :)

@Nancy: oh no! Hopefully it doesn't feel like something you have to work on (or should work on). That always adds to the hard. Things can be worked on in their own time.